- People who are brilliant at handling awkward situations usually say a few polite things:
- 1. ‘You’re drawing more attention to yourself than you may want to right now’
- 2. ‘Maybe you should tone it down a bit’
- 3. ‘You seem a little out of your element right now’
- 4. ‘I think it’s time to shift gears’
- 5. ‘A little break would be good right about now’
- 6. ‘It might be helpful to dial it down a little’
- 7. ‘No one’s judging you’
- 8. ‘Don’t worry, everyone has those moments’
When someone tries to stop you from embarrassing yourself, it’s often because they care about you and want to support you in what could turn out to be a really awkward moment. We all do clumsy things from time to time; it’s only human. In these moments, brilliant people know phrases they can use to politely say, “You’re embarrassing yourself,” without calling attention to it or making things worse.
People who help you avoid embarrassment or awkward situations don’t want you to feel bad, especially if they sense you’re already getting upset or anxious. They help by normalizing the situation and making it less weird for everyone, so it doesn’t feel like the focus is entirely on you.
People who are brilliant at handling awkward situations usually say a few polite things:
1. ‘You’re drawing more attention to yourself than you may want to right now’
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When someone tells you that you’re drawing a lot of attention to yourself, they might be trying to help you be more aware of how you’re coming across. It could be their way of politely hinting that you’re being overly noticeable in a way that might not be ideal for the situation.
Relationship and communication expert Barton Goldsmith, Ph.D., explained that you need to set boundaries with people who have attention-seeking behaviors. “If you tolerate bad behavior, you will simply encourage it to continue happening,” says Goldsmith. It’s easier to nudge them to adjust their behavior without being harsh.
2. ‘Maybe you should tone it down a bit’
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If you’re dominating the conversation or speaking over others, they may suggest giving others more space to contribute. This will make the balance of the interaction feel more comfortable for everyone. They might worry that your behavior could come across as too much, and they want to keep you from standing out in a negative way.
“People are more sensitive to tone than to the explicit content of spoken or written language,” said psychologist Rick Hanson, Ph.D. That is why it is important to talk to people with a nice tone rather than a harsh one. You might be able to convince them to simmer down if you are polite about it.
3. ‘You seem a little out of your element right now’
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A person might feel that your behavior or attitude doesn’t quite fit the context or environment you’re in. This could happen at a social gathering or perhaps in a work situation you’re new to. They might feel you’re in an unfamiliar environment or doing something you’re not comfortable with, which can make you seem unsure or awkward.
Asking for someone’s advice at work can be simple with the right terminology, according to Dr. Laurence J. Stybel. For example, instead of saying “What do you think?” say “This is an area where you have experience. I’m reaching out to you for a second opinion.” It’s a way of showing you understand the situation might be challenging for you, and you’re not in your typical role or element.
4. ‘I think it’s time to shift gears’
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If things feel too forced, it’s better to shift the conversation to make it feel more comfortable. The person making things awkward might feel that you’re using an approach that isn’t quite working or doesn’t match the vibe of the moment. If the conversation or situation is becoming stagnant, then you could suggest a change of pace to move things forward in a way that feels more organic.
5. ‘A little break would be good right about now’
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If the situation feels tense, taking a break can ease the pressure and help you return feeling more at ease. A break can take you out of the spotlight for a short while, shift the focus away from you and the awkward moment, and help everyone move on more smoothly.
Research shows that breaks can actually improve performance when we are stuck or need fresh ideas. Doing different things while on breaks may extend periods of attention and inspire new ways to approach a situation. People might notice that you’re feeling overwhelmed and suggest a short break to give you time to relax and regain your confidence.
6. ‘It might be helpful to dial it down a little’
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Sometimes, the more we react to a situation, the more attention it attracts. By dialing it down, they might be suggesting that a more measured approach will help the situation settle faster and prevent further discomfort. They could gently be guiding you to adopt a more understated approach, so you don’t draw too much focus to the awkwardness at hand.
7. ‘No one’s judging you’
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A casually polite person might sense that you’re feeling self-conscious about how others are perceiving you, and they want to remind you that people are likely not focused on your mistake or awkwardness (or you at all!) as much as you think. By telling you no one is judging, they’re trying to help you relax and stop overthinking the situation, allowing you to move past the embarrassment more easily.
8. ‘Don’t worry, everyone has those moments’
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Embarrassing moments can feel really awkward, and the person might be trying to lighten the mood and help you feel more relaxed, so the situation feels less intense. They want to reassure you that embarrassing moments happen to everyone, no matter who they are.
According to philosopher Susanna Newsonen, “85% of the things we worry about never happen.” This is why people shouldn’t feel embarrassed about things that they can’t change. After all, life is uncertain, and things will randomly happen to you. By saying ‘everyone has those moments,’ a person may be politely encouraging you to brush it off and move forward, rather than getting stuck in the discomfort of the moment.
Sylvia Ojeda is an author who has over a decade of experience writing novels and screenplays. She writes about self-help, relationships, culture, and human-interest topics.
