Having been in many relationships that were destroyed by behavior caused by chronically insecure men, I can honestly say that insecurity is now a dealbreaker for me. When you\u2019re insecure, your inner voice tells you that you\u2019re not enough, that the person you\u2019re with is going to leave \u2014 and that can make you react in crazy ways, even if you know you should feel more confident.<\/p>\n
I\u2019ve seen people insecure about relationships turn abusive, cheat, or even just get super-controlling as a way to try to make themselves feel better about their \u201cchances\u201d with people. You can\u2019t do much to make people less insecure either,\u00a0since that\u2019s a \u201cself\u201d problem rather than an external one in most cases.<\/p>\n
That\u2019s why chronic insecurity became a dealbreaker for me,\u00a0and why I advise people to think twice when dating a chronically insecure man. That being said, there are usually warning signs he’s insecure about being in a relationship with you.<\/p>\n
Chronically insecure men usually do these things casually in everyday life:<\/h2>\n1.\u00a0They criticize you \u2014 a lot<\/h3>\n
I want to point out a truism that many teachers say to bullied kids at school: people who criticize and tear others down do so because they typically feel inferior to you. This is extremely true in dating and is the reason why so many men are cruel to women. That being said, constant criticism is often the first sign of an abusive partner who’s chronically insecure. If you see this happening, run for the hills. Constant criticism often reflects insecurity in a person.\u00a0<\/p>\n
2.\u00a0They’re a total doormat around you<\/h3>\n
Another sign of chronic insecurity is when guys tend to \u201cdoormat\u201d themselves and turn into people without opinions. This isn\u2019t only boring in a partner, it\u2019s also a surefire way for resentment to build. They won\u2019t tell you what they really want\u00a0or even really feel\u00a0until they explode in rage.<\/p>\n RELATED: 15 Signs Your Husband Is Undermining And Trying To Control You, Backed By Psychology<\/strong><\/p>\n Believe it or not, dominant men are not confident men. They are men who, for one reason or another, think that the only thing they have to offer is masculinity and cockiness. From what I\u2019ve seen, the more domineering a man is, the less likely it is that he will be a healthy and good partner. There\u2019s a reason why, too.\u00a0<\/p>\n To chronically insecure guys like this, you are little else but something that affirms that, yes, he\u2019s a man. That\u2019s it. It\u2019s not about you; it\u2019s about him trying to fill a hollow hole in his heart that can never be satiated\u00a0because the confidence he wants can never be obtained externally.<\/p>\n Yes, you know he has a BMW. He\u2019s also told you about his volunteer work, his biceps, and whatever else he thinks will impress you. Guys who make a point of regularly talking about how they are a good catch often feel insecure about their position with the person they\u2019re dating. While this may be innocuous, you have to\u00a0remember that confident people don\u2019t brag.<\/p>\n RELATED: If A Man Does These 12 Things, He’ll Likely Be A Truly Terrible Husband<\/strong><\/p>\n You know the type. The chronically insecure guy who\u2019s always boasting about the women he ‘gets with’ who doesn\u2019t get any action. This is a\u00a0thing, and men don\u2019t do this unless they have serious issues with their confidence.<\/p>\n From what I\u2019ve seen, most guys who have insecurities do have them leak out in one way or another. They may say something about how \u201cnice guys finish\u00a0last\u201d or start talking loudly to the point that people turn to stare.<\/p>\n Either way, if he\u2019s making a total jerk of himself, it’s one of the signs he’s insecure about being in a relationship with you. This implies that someone feels they need to be aggressive or less-than-kind to achieve success, suggesting a lack of confidence in their ability to be valued for their genuine positive qualities.\u00a0<\/p>\n![\"insecure](\"https:\/\/www.yourtango.com\/sites\/default\/files\/image_blog\/2026-07\/insecure-man-doormat-looking-down.png\" "\\"Men")
<\/span> fizkes \/ Shutterstock<\/span><\/p>\n3.\u00a0Insecure men insist on trying to play \u201calpha male\u201d<\/h3>\n
4.\u00a0Men like this constantly point out their good qualities<\/h3>\n
5.\u00a0They try to act like a \u201cplayer\u201d<\/h3>\n
6.\u00a0Insecure men act a little wonky<\/h3>\n
![\"serious](\"https:\/\/www.yourtango.com\/sites\/default\/files\/image_blog\/2026-07\/serious-insecure-man.png\" "\\"Men")
<\/span> Alef Morais \/ Unsplash<\/span><\/p>\n