We all know someone who pouts and acts incredibly hurt when they don’t get what they want. These people have learned that the most effective way for them to get their way is to use emotional guilt to make others feel bad enough to give in.<\/p>\n
Sometimes my friends will ask me to hang out when I\u2019m feeling exhausted. If I have no energy to be social, I have to tell them I can\u2019t go. Most of the time, they\u2019ll understand, but some don\u2019t care. These emotional manipulators often use tried-and-true phrases to make people feel too guilty to say no to them.<\/p>\n
People who use emotional guilt to get their way frequently say these phrases<\/h2>\n1. \u201cI\u2019ll feel awkward if I have to go alone\u201d<\/h3>\n
One tactic manipulators use when you tell them you can\u2019t hang out is making you feel bad for them. If there\u2019s an event I don\u2019t want to attend, my friends who fall back on guilt tell me they’ll feel awkward if they have to go alone. This is an attempt to use people\u2019s empathy against them.<\/p>\n People who use emotional guilt are often pretty insecure. They aren’t always lying about feeling awkward if they have to go alone, but that shouldn\u2019t be anyone else’s responsibility. Adults don’t need a babysitter, and they shouldn\u2019t have to be accompanied everywhere just because they\u2019re too afraid of being judged for being by themselves.<\/p>\n RELATED: People Who Are Great At Reading The Room Usually Develop 8 Habits That Make Them Less Socially Awkward<\/strong><\/p>\n Most of the time, when I notice someone using emotional guilt against me, I\u2019ll cut them off. But some of those friends are really good people at heart. They\u2019ll listen to me when I need to rant or always invite me to a group plan. They\u2019re just too insecure to be vulnerable. They can\u2019t be open and honest about how they\u2019re feeling, so they guilt-trip their friends instead. If I don\u2019t want to go somewhere, they\u2019ll tell me they would do it for me.<\/p>\n People who use this phrase make it hard to argue with them because if they\u2019ve done a lot for you in the past, their reason is somewhat valid. They probably would do it for you, but that doesn\u2019t mean you have to do the same. Friendship isn\u2019t transactional. Just because they\u2019re willing to hang out all the time doesn\u2019t mean their friends have to be okay with that too.<\/p>\n Life is short, and you never know what\u2019s going to happen. People who guilt-trip others use that idea to convince them to do something they don’t want to do. They usually mean that there\u2019s a possibility that you guys won\u2019t be in the same area in the coming years or could lose touch. They want to convince you to take advantage of the time you have and hang out with them.<\/p>\n This tactic works a lot of the time because if they\u2019re close to you, there\u2019s a reason for that. They probably care about you and don’t want to miss out on time with you. Still, the idea that you have to take advantage of every moment because life is short leads you to do more than you can handle and burn yourself out.<\/p>\n RELATED: Kids Raised By Parents Who Prioritized Self-Esteem Usually Heard 10 Phrases In Their Childhood Homes <\/strong><\/p>\n People who use emotional guilt to make you do what they want will make themselves seem less capable than they actually are. They\u2019ll use weaponized incompetence so they make you handle things they don\u2019t want to do themselves.<\/p>\n Say someone has a broken light fixture in their house and they don\u2019t want to fix it themselves. Learning a new skill and doing the manual work to fix it is probably too much for them. They\u2019ll ask someone else for help and then say they’re embarrassed that they can\u2019t just do it themselves. That way, the person they are asking will feel sympathetic toward them because they\u2019re saying they feel bad about themselves for not knowing how to do it.<\/p>\n Emotional guilt doesn\u2019t always show up by someone making you feel bad for them. People who use those tactics to get their way don\u2019t just use their own insecurities to manipulate people. They\u2019ll also use other people’s feelings to make them feel like they have to hang out or do what the other person wants.<\/p>\n They\u2019re the kind of people who say they’ll drive after someone tells them no as a way of invalidating any excuse the other person could make, causing the other person to feel bad about themselves for not being social and saying yes to a fun experience, even if they really just need a break.<\/p>\n RELATED: Men Who Act Like Their Problems Are Worse Than Everyone Else’s Usually Say 8 Phrases In Casual Conversation<\/strong><\/p>\n People who use guilt trips love to make comparisons because they are so insecure. They\u2019ll get jealous if you spend time with others but then are busy when they try to make plans with you, so they\u2019ll remind you that you were free when they asked you to hang out.<\/p>\n This isn\u2019t someone trying to express feelings in a healthy way. If someone really wanted to be heard, they would talk about how they\u2019re feeling instead of comparing your commitment to them to your commitment to others.<\/p>\n The fear of missing out isn\u2019t just a hashtag. It’s a real feeling people experience when everyone is hanging out without them. People want to be part of a group, and when there\u2019s something that happens that makes them feel disconnected from that group, it can be emotionally scary. Our brains get triggered, and we fear missing out on memories the group will bond over without them.<\/p>\n People who use guilt to get their way use that feeling against others. They\u2019ll say everyone will be there, just to make you feel like you have to as well.<\/p>\n![\"woman](\"https:\/\/www.yourtango.com\/sites\/default\/files\/image_blog\/2026-09\/people-who-use-emotional-guilt-to-get-their-way-almost-always-say-ill-feel-awkward.png\" "\\"people")
<\/span> yacobchuk from Getty Images via Canva<\/span><\/p>\n2. \u201cI would do it for you\u201d\u00a0<\/h3>\n
3. \u201cWho knows where we\u2019ll be in the future?\u201d<\/h3>\n
4. \u201cI\u2019m embarrassed that I can\u2019t just do it myself\u201d<\/h3>\n
![\"woman](\"https:\/\/www.yourtango.com\/sites\/default\/files\/image_blog\/2026-09\/people-who-use-emotional-guilt-to-get-their-way-almost-always-say-im-embarrassed.png\" "\\"people")
<\/span> Africa Images via Canva<\/span><\/p>\n5. \u201cI’ll drive\u201d<\/h3>\n
6. \u201cYou were free when they asked to hang out\u201d<\/h3>\n
7. \u201cEveryone\u2019s going to be there\u201d<\/h3>\n
![\"man](\"https:\/\/www.yourtango.com\/sites\/default\/files\/image_blog\/2026-09\/people-who-use-emotional-guilt-to-get-their-way-almost-always-say-phrases-in-conversation-everyone-will-be-there.png\" "\\"people")
<\/span> Zinkevych from Getty Images via Canva<\/span><\/p>\n